8 Signs it’s time to leave the (after) party

You’ve had a long and hard week of work and you can’t wait for the weekend to start. After a few drinks with your friends in your local, it’s time to sweat out all that negative energy on the dance floor.

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You’ve entered the venue and you quickly lock into the vibe. But as the night wears on, you’re mind is beginning to stray, your focus blurs, and you take a quick look deep inside your wallet, and realize “I need to get the fuck out of here…ASAP”.

We’ve all been there. These are the eight signs it’s time to go home.

Too many bros are taking their shirt off

Why are these EDM fed, tanning bed freaks doing E’d up burpees in here again?!

You’re closing one eye to focus on things.

It probably wasn’t the wisest idea to neck that last four drinks. When it gets to the point where a drink with a toxicity higher than the average Chemistry lab test tube begins to sound palatable… Taxi time.

You just realized that the huge line of speed you did in the bathroom was actually ketamine.

You are quickly transforming into a huge drooling blob man crawling around the floor. Keep sliding out that front door!

The sun becomes an enemy

When curtains begin to resemble the cape of a super hero protecting you from the cruel, fiery beast that is the sun; basically when you check your watch and the thought of turning in crosses your mind for the first time, that’s when you know the potential for any fun has expired.

You start daydreaming about your laundry, going to the supermarket.

Uh oh! You’ve lost focus and couldn’t give a fuck about this anymore! Time to get home and rest up so you can crush those chores tomorrow morning!

Your comedown is starting already.

The only effect it has on you is that you are just grinding your teeth and sweating your balls off. Another pill isn’t going to save you now. Winter is coming.

Your friends have all quietly bounced.

All you have left is this annoying guy that you just met in the smoking area, blaring in your ear: “Hey dude, where is the afterparty? Your house?”

Yeah mate, meet you there…

The DJ left and some intruder is playing “a chart house mix”.

When you don’t have the energy to protest against a weak chart house mix some rogue intruder to the group has put on which would have earlier resulted in an aux cable war of the ages. Fucking. Leave. Now.